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Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Murderers

A useful tip for serial killers and any other freelance killers:
If you're looking for a good pair of scissors to stab your victims to death, pop into your local Staples.
They have a whole range of scissors in a variety of sizes, colours and designs.
However, if you're looking for a simple box cutter or stanley knife or some replacement Exacto blades, don't bother going to Staples.
They don't carry them.
This will be especially frustrating to any murderers who might also work in the arts and need a basic blade to complete simple everyday tasks...

5 comments:

GOGOPEDRO said...

god damned staples.
they don't even have pocket protectors.

P

Richard Mitchelson said...

Whom would I invoice as a freelance killer? The person i have killed is dead... and therefore i will be waiting more than 30days... and i hate that.

Elliot Cowan said...

Freelance murderers work pro bono.

G3T Films said...

Fur is murder, with some mighty fine returns!

Richard Mitchelson said...

for Bono, him from U2? Is he a murderer or head of some crime maffia boss??? wow what a revelation, it explains a lot...

 
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